a wedding (Ukrainian style?)

we're back in Kyiv. Turkey was fantastic. i'm trying to get some pictures posted.

tonight Ilya, Lena, and i attended the wedding reception of Ilya's old friend Boris. we arrived late. maybe 50 people (family and closest friends) were in the rented reception room of the old school. wooden utensils were being handed to the winners of some sort of contest. (i think this was non-traditional.) a bunch of tables were set up in the shape of a horseshoe. Boris and his bride were in the middle, and in front of them were a lot of flowers, a traditional loaf of bread, and an embroidered sash. we took seats with everyone else. the food was half-eaten and most of the bottles (wine, vodka, juice, water) were half-empty.

at the request of the MC (in this case, a woman hired for the job) the bride's brother brought out a huge, gift-wrapped box. a lot of people crowded around. amid a lot of cheering it was opened. i didn't see what was inside. (actually, neither did Ilya or Lena, making us suspect that they didn't actually open it.)

regardless, the happy couple kissed. and i don't mean just kissed, they actually went at each other. it was sweet. we all yelled our praise. a toast occurred, then a short interlude during which the DJ played an elevator version of the Beatles' Obla-Di-Obla-Da. we toasted again. the MC chimed in: "who's the baldest man here?" after some analysis it was determined that a particular gentleman was (as it turned out) the lucky man. the MC announced there would be a short-skirt contest.

seven young women lined up. only one wore a skirt. the rest hiked up their dresses as far as they could go. the bald man stretched a tape from their heals as far up as HE could go, yelling out the centimeters each girl had achieved. the Best Woman won the contest -- her dress had the highest slit. for winning she was allowed to present the bride & groom with a box (oddly, a beat-up, yellow & blue UkrPost box) inside which the happy couple found a freshly picked head of cabbage.

the MC announced the rules: "tear the cabbage apart and, depending on the color of the button found inside, you will have a boy (red button) or girl (blue button)." turned out it was a joke and they found nothing inside! ha ha! not sure what that means. the couple made-out again.

there was a break in the action. we signaled to the bride & groom and made for the outer hallway. Ilya wanted to give his regards and make an early exit. but before Boris could break away, his new mother-in-law arrived to the hallway, shoeless with mud covering her feet and ankles. clearly a Ukrainian tradition! a plastic tub with water appeared. then Boris, wielding a bottle of vodka! the woman acted wild, stomping her feet and trying to wipe mud on anyone nearby. (us!) Boris managed to get her feet into the tub and, using the vodka, washed the mud from her legs. we all cheered. the reconciled mother-in-law and son-in-law went to the dance floor, twirling happily to a chancon tune.

we went outside, exclaiming to each other with a glance how difficult our endeavor would be, leaving early after arriving late. but luck was on our side -- fireworks began exploding over the soccer field across the street. everyone, including the newlyweds, came outside to admire this salute to the lucky pair. much cheering. afterwards, we were able to congratulate the them both, chat with them for awhile, toast them with a sip of champaign, and make a smooth exit.

we returned to the apartment where Sasha, Alya, and Lena's sister Yulya were relaxing. we ate a small dinner, drank some congac, and watched the second half of Predator, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger.